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Zombie 3

A deadly virus known as Death 1 Compound is snatched from a research lab but the virus is released during the thief's escape. He is infected (surprise surprise) and turns into a flesh eating zombie. He holes up in a local hotel and spreads the virus. The army come in and kill everybody that is contaminated. However they burn the bodies and the ashes are released and react with the air.

Meanwhile, three off duty soldiers meet up with and save a camper van of (supposedly) attractive women who have been attacked by zombified birds. Instead of heading to a hospital they decide that the local hotel is a better bet. Which hotel, you guessed it, the same one that just cleared out its zomboid flesh digesting infestation. From there on in the survivors have to deal with wave after wave of zombies as well as the army who are under orders to kill everything in the contaminated area. The few left living realise the predicament they are in but vow to fight on.

OK, listen up folks this may get confusing. This movie is actually Zombi 3 , the sequel to Zombi 2 (clever of me I know), which is also known as Zombie Flesh Eaters , which was a sequel to Zombi (are you amazed by my brilliant acute mind yet?), which is more commonly known as Dawn of the Dead . So you could say that this is Dawn of the Dead 3 (that is if you discount Day of the Dead , and if you do please leave the room now!). Also don't get this confused with Zombie 3 (directed by Andrea Bianchi) AKA Zombie Horror AKA La Notti Del Terrore AKA Night of Terror , which was an unofficial follow up to Fulci's Zombie Flesh Eaters aka Zombi 2 . Got that? Anyway, just like Zombie Flesh Eaters had fuck all to do with Dawn of the Dead, except that it had shit loads of deadsters dancing the zombie mambo, Zombie Flesh Eaters 2 has fuck all to do with its predecessor other than, you got it, shit loads of deadsters dancing the zombie mambo.

The living are just as stupid, I mean there are a trio of soldiers on weekend leave, that if we had to rely on them to win a war, we would be in deep shit, while the women spend more time screaming and letting the dead get up close and personal then making a run for it and then tripping up on air. But it's easy to take pot shots at this kind of thing, and these knuckleheads in particular. Especially in an Italian zombie movie. Also I'm not being entirely fair to this flick, as it doesn't just have the humdrum zomboid shuffle, no sirrreee. Some of these funky flesh eating fuckwits can talk, some can run and some can jump and leap like steroid stuffed ninja numpties. We are also served up the gigantically stupid sight of a decapitated head flying from a fridge to feast on flesh. Fuckin' out there!

The credits say that this slice of deliriously daft, but worryingly watch able, nonsense was delivered to us by the gore-meister general himself Lucio Fulci, but it's painfully obvious that he only had a hand in a few scenes. The man we have to thank for this (un)masterpiece is Bruno Mattei, the guy who treated us to another zombie film that falls under the banner of A Film I Should Hate But I Just Can't, the incredibly stupid Zombie Creeping Flesh . Anyway, this movie is as dumb as dog shit and a real chore to watch between the zombie chow downs. OK, that makes the reviewer here sound like an anorak wearing, gore score counting, galactically sized geekozoid, but why else do we watch these kinds of movies? I mean the plot blows hamster dick and the acting, well I think I'm quite a nice guy for calling it acting at all.

The music is your clichéd synthesiser shit sandwich, which compared with the score for Zombie Flesh Eaters could have been bettered by rat farts and the sounds of two cats fucking. Hell! the flick doesn't even conform to a set zombie mythology. This is just a hodge podge of zombie clichés slung together with a hope and a prayer. It entertains enough but you have to be real forgiving. By the way does anyone know if Deran Serafian is the same guy that directed the Charlie Sheen classic Terminal Velocity ?

Copyright © Martainn Russell 2002-2005

Rating: 0.0 / 5 (0 votes)
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